Parents should recognize that despite their good intentions to relocate their kids to a new place with better neighborhood and school, they will still inadvertently end up traumatizing their kids. Moving is a tough experience especially to the young children. The process can also be made triple times difficult particularly if the move is precipitated by any painful experiences such as a job loss for one of the parents, divorce, or perhaps, death of a family member. Being the adults and the mature ones in this situation, the parents must endeavor to help their kids to emotionally cope with the big move. How? Parents should try these steps below:
Talk with your kids
No matter what compelled you to move, it’s very important that you keep your kids informed about your moving plans early on. Talking with your kids and being honest with them is one of the best decisions you’ll ever make. You can’t keep mum about your plans to relocate. Talking to them will help your kids understand you and your reasons for leaving the place they considered home for their past short years. Be honest when you talk to them about your reasons for moving. Children will appreciate knowing the truth rather than be kept in the dark about the whole situation.
Give your kids some space
When you break the news of the move to your kids, expect an ensuing angry outburst from them. It’s normal for kids to cry, stomp their feet, slam the door and to be outwardly defiant at you. When this happens, don’t fight with your kids. Give them some space to adjust to the idea of the move. Kids will be naturally hurt to leave their friends and anything they feel comfortable with behind. Often vehement reactions are just manifestations of their fear. Instead of fighting, be calm and reassure your kids that everything will turn out all right.
Allow kids to take part in making decisions
Moving can make kids feel helpless. They’ll feel pushed into a situation which they are totally unhappy about. In order for kids to gain some control in the situation, make sure that they take active part in deciding some aspects of the move. If you haven’t found a house to move in yet, enlist the help of your kids in doing house-hunting. They should also be involved in searching for their new school. In this way, they’ll feel less railroaded into the whole process of moving.
Respect the relationship your kids have formed
As mentioned earlier, the process of moving can be hurtful for the kids because they’ll be leaving their closest friends behind. As a parent, you may be quick to say they can forge new friendships in the new neighborhood. But since kids may not have that flexible and mature attitude yet, it’s better to refrain from making such comments. Instead, show some respect for the relationships that they have already nurtured. At best, give reassurance to your kids that they still can communicate with their friends on an everyday basis. Thanks to technology nowadays, children can call, text or chat with their friends even if they are thousand miles away.